Friday 30 May 2014

iPad


Pads of the eye spy!
And I see them, don't think I don't.
I know you're watching.
The tablets are recorded and reported.
Do you remember when I rolled up drunk
and I loved you enormously
through those forgotten ramblings?
We were talking about beaches.
You burn a hole in my pocket
every single awful day.


Thursday 29 May 2014

Time


Time is not a healer
She's cruel and perverted,
sticking the knife in gleefully.


Time doesn't heal
She withers and wastes us
like dead things decomposing,
gently, imperceptibly imploding,
witless while we diminish


No, Time is not a healer
She's the Queen of Sorrows
in a tower of regret and remorse
heralded by jarring dreams
of old wounds and foolish hopes.


Time will put you under her boot
and press you into filthy misery.
She will promise future reprieve
and then piss the past on you
laughing cruelly with a tick-tock.


I'm telling you, Time is a jailer
jangling all her endless keys
like so many memories.



Wednesday 28 May 2014

Bee Populations Are Shrinking


Something terrible will happen when all the bees are dead
so let them die.
Let them wither and and fall from the sky
and crawl terminally across pavements.
Let their velvet turn to dust in the wind.
Let all the flowers search the empty blue in vain
until their disappointed faces crumple
and they bend to the ground in despair.
Let the world hurtle through space,
lose integrity, shatter and fragment.
Let me never see another bee until I die
for they remind me of honey once loved.



Monday 26 May 2014

Dolphins


Looking at pictures of dolphins, leaping
free of aquatic mundanity. Goodness,
to feel the sun on your streamlined skin
when all you've known is the cold wet
of murky depth. What a fantasy
to make-believe you could fly like the birds
your eye has spied beyond the rippled ceiling.
Perhaps that's why the water is so deep and wide;
so that brief moment in the sun is beyond all bliss.


Sunday 18 May 2014

Hardly a Cloud



The nearest star is filling the sky today
Burning, blazing, sizzling, smiling.
The wildlife is frisky with the heat of it
But you're barely thinking of me at all
You only send a fading, spotted telegraph
So long - you'll be OK - stop
and with that you sail away contentedly
Unless...
Unless your thoughts today are all sunlight
It's nice to think you happy after all.
I strip off my shirt and bathe in you
soak you all up through my pores
I'll have you strengthen my lonely bones.



Saturday 17 May 2014

Watching the Sky



today you're spread far too thin
wispy on the wind and barely tangible
you feel a distance from the surface of the earth
so little substance, you can be looked right through
are you eating enough, my love?


you move imperceptibly like a sadness
one always there and slow to depart
you are pale and hold no weight at all
breaking up without me seeing
come closer my lovely

It must be cold where you are
you can shout and cry if you want -
just gather some mass and fill my eye
be a blanket, a panorama
just be nearer to me.

Blue is a heartsick colour after all.




Thursday 15 May 2014

Mister Dawkins Falls in Love


A man watches water falling on a Sunday
from his spot where the sun once shone.
All his life, he pondered the wonders
of existence. The meaning of a void
that didn't want filling.
The foreigner called Devotion.
So he sits, this Sunday afternoon,
thinking how can I be so damn sure
of a myth so thoroughly debunked?
Perhaps at last he's found faith.



Wednesday 14 May 2014

Meeting Asleep


Tonight I know the first part
familiar now the trapezius.
Skin, muscle and tendon
but more, the sensation
of love beside my body
against my tired spirit
curled up by my soul
a fireside cat, content.
Just like coming home
to a first kiss of sorts
returning with my lips
just above the shoulder.

Monday 12 May 2014

Heart of Science



We're so proud of our science
like beaming parents at a nativity.
We put the hows on a plinth
like Jupiter or Mars
and frame paintings of whys,
give them pride of place.
But the physics of love
don't change a thing.
It only matters that we feel,
not how it came to be.


Saturday 10 May 2014

End of Endings


An ending.
An end to pretending and sweeping certainty under the rug.
It's just recognition that the wheel keeps on turning.
With such grace and poise, even as she scorches the earth
she destroys dreams with charm and a smile that tickles my ear.
I guess I'll find out what forever feels like.

But if Armageddon goes down in the morning,
if fire pours out from heaven and hell, and the Devil himself
seeks me out, howling on the battlefield, I can at least say:
meh, I've seen worse. I already got burned.
And not even he could think that nothing follows an ending.

Say, like the big bang in reverse; all these comets,
and constellations, kindled stars and circling planets,
all flirting in cosmic courtship. All the gas giants, white dwarfs
and the timid, potent black holes. Do you really think
one day they'll all be swallowed, sucked into infinity?
Wherever would they go at the end of days?

What would happen to irresistible, cogent gravity?
Surely you can't cram away all the sprightly atoms
of the cosmos into such a small thing as The End.
Not now the void is bursting at the seams.
Even if it did fit, don't they say it would catapult
right back out, big and bold as ever?

If I were a betting man, I'd take a punt on that.
Because if favourite books stay with you
then do they ever really end? Do you ever
turn the page on a furious, canny character
or his improbable journey home for love -
no, not even that - just a glimpse, a hope for love.
That's why you fall for an idealist while he labours at reality.

I could lasso the moon and drink the sea
and flatten the earth searching for you.
Waiting. And it's okay that the world is ending
It's alright, it's fine. Because it happened before.
The sky fell in and the celestial sphere floundered,
wobbled on it's axis, but orbit was maintained.
And the sun and moon continued their dance at distance.

Funny, when you think, as the planet cracked
they weren't frightened. The population of two

still found time to discuss the merits of film and song
and the local news. The universe wouldn't have heard
lovers torn apart but only the chatter of birdsong
and sunlight filtering through the clouds once more.

I don't even mind the clouds now. In fact they reassure.
They are your thoughts smiling down on me
saying we're not crazy or don't be such a drama queen
and the rain is your tears. I decide that you cry oceans for me
and write your best stuff as you go with the wind.
Away from me. But still circling the planet.

I see your thoughts everyday and send my mind up
to mingle. Oh, you look a little brighter today or
come on, doofus, don't cry. And I never, ever say
the wrong thing. Except one day, you will kick out
at a dark cumulonimbus and send thunder rattling down.
But I won't even mind that. I'll watch the light show
and hold your hand when you're drained of spark.

Your waters nourish this dry, broken land.
Still here when I need you. Looking out for me.
Hard to imagine that summer will ever emerge
from the depths of winter. But the sun and the rains,
the clouds and blue sky, they all inexorably return.
I'm sorry but your long-term weather forecast will never
make the newspaper. It's already gone to print.

Speaking of weather, it's coming down like hell today.
It makes want to write a soundtrack to catastrophe
I mean, there's the music of water and The Weatherman
but perhaps I could score some pleasing heartache.
Overlay some straining string and raindrop beats.
I feel a deep, shivering bass in the pit of my stomach.

I have it on good authority that people should chase happiness,
follow its faint trail and hunt it down like a great, rare beast,
cut off its head and stick it on the wall. Otherwise, one day
grown-ups might ask you Mum, why does that empty space
above the mantelpiece reflect so brightly in your eye?

and what will you advise if they ever catch the scent?
You told me mothers want their children to be happy.

Not that I question the bravery of martyrs. Admirable, no doubt.
People once told me I was brave for going into orbit.
Ooh, I think you're dead brave they said, but nobody knew
I was taking the safer option. I had done the numbers.
I only aimed for the stratosphere while all the aurorae,
shooting stars and solar flares went unexplored, far above me.
And look, they're still up there, regretfully smouldering.

Gah! Do I ever wish life was a story I could write
instead of watching a distant disaster unfolding on the telly.
Everyone likes a flawed hero, but a little airbrushing
wouldn't go amiss. Just a touch less prone to crippling weakness
and a princess whose ropes wouldn't beg not to be cut.
I suppose a happy ending would be somewhat less credible.

Some say that fairy tales are mere deceptions
constructs setting an unlikely bar and
fattening hope while starving reality to death.
But my optimism got topped up. An historian
might argue that they're folktales. For sure,
dressed up in silk and steel, but just fact from a distance.

And I am a student of history. I once thought it taught me
what was wrong with everything these days.
But yesterday gave me the most valuable lesson:
that true love exists - that's right - and it's a stubborn thing.
You can be told so in songs or poems and it might seem obvious.
But now I understand those old men in movies that say I just knew...

So love is real and forever, yep. And you can't argue;
It's been irrefutably proven by our historical study.
The results are in and quite conclusive, n'est pas?
Alright, you can doubt Science and God or whatever
or The Universe at work or whatever. But you can't escape
the experience of History; it just happened to us both.

That's definite. A tangible certainty among the hypotheticals.
History repeats; and that's a kind of open ending.


Monday 5 May 2014

Fight From Seed


There are things I have to do, like
push away the pressure of the earth,
use the cloying, airless dirt and use it
to grow. To strengthen my being.

I must gather in the necessary
and leave behind no-good sediment
I must learn to show my head
above the surface now and then.

Let my shape be straight, like
an arrow to the atmosphere;
durable, full of life and limber.
Let my fibres flex.

I will open my arms and eyes
and heart. Uncurl and let myself be
washed with light and bathed in sky.

The birds will talk. They'll chatter
and ponder my slow progress.
The wind will tease or nudge,
at times perhaps huff and puff.

Seasons will always wax and wane
Frost. Snow. Heat. Drought.
I must endure. Acclimatise. 
But all the time I will wonder:
Why? For what reason?

Well, for love of the earth I come from;
the ground that holds my body.
And for the air, cool and clearing.
For the bees who visit, fussing
and buzzing, always interested.

And for myself.

But always, my eye will turn up
to you, radiant Sun. Out of reach
but shining down your sustenance.
And what's wrong with that?

What's wrong with taking strength,
with aspiring? Your light doesn't fall
for me exclusively but if a little
warms my upturned face,
where's the harm? I will always
have the earth. And the bees.

But if you make me stand
some small bit taller, straighter,
and stretch my roots wider,
maybe I will feel like belonging
to this flowerbed. 



Saturday 3 May 2014

Poem for no-one


If I could pen the content of my heart
pour out the symphony of feeling
or wring out the ache onto manuscript
what music it would make

If I was fluent in the language of my soul
could comprehended my psyche
and articulate the kernel of my essence
what oratory you would hear

If I could paint my love upon canvas
emote as dashes of bursting colour
and let our kisses linger in brushstrokes
I would put masters to shame

Passion as invention, devotion as poetry
If I could create with mind and bone
then you'd know my heart
and all the world's lovers would covet
your gallery of love's art

Thursday 1 May 2014

Onward, then

So I felt like writing something today and decided to set myself a task. Since I had to take a trip, I decided that today's prompt is to write about a journey.


Not to Schedule


I rode a train today, to a newly-old life
of course in the tedious, required rain

I thought of all the old stations we visit
hard-to-get-to and with limited service
exits not marked, no shelter from the elements
tracks leading nowhere or going in circles.

It got me thinking about a journey
I'd been plotting in my mind's map
which I think got cancelled due
to a creeping frost on the lines.

It made me think of you thinking
of a stranger on a train and wondered
if you'd prefer him to remain strange
and perfect. Well, too late I guess.

I never kept any skeletons, I told you
so you can't pretend you didn't know
I might come off the rails or forget
to apply the brake at the bend.

Now we're not running to timetable
and who knows when normal service will resume.

Why can't we ditch this obsolete transport
go to a place no planned route takes you
ride our bikes to a quiet, steep-ish hill,
lift our feet off the pedals and let go...

Well, I know. Get to the station first.
But one day, when the weather's nice.


Paint Poem

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